Learning French: apologizing

For this month’s French conversation blog, we want you to say sorry. But don’t worry, you’ve not done anything wrong!  What we mean is, we want to share with you all of the ways to say sorry, offer apologies and accept apologies in French.

This blog looks at the phrases we can use to express these concepts in both formal and informal settings. We’ll look at all the different registers of apologies in the possible situations you might encounter them.

In English, while we can use all sorts of fancy phrases to plead forgiveness, there is one simple word that unites them all – sorry. Saying this word is pretty much universal in terms of the situations we may encounter. Whether with friends, people you don’t know, for small things or for huge problems, ‘sorry’ usually works for giving any type of apology. Shall we see if it’s the same in French?

  1. Using pardon

French speakers use pardon as a fairly polite way of saying sorry for something that’s not too significant. Although we have the exact same word with the same spelling in English, remember to say this one with a French accent to be understood!

You can also use pardon as a question if you didn’t catch something that someone just said. In the same way we might say ‘sorry?’ in English.

For a more formal use of the word in a set phrase to say sorry, you can also say ‘Je vous demande pardon’.

  • Using s’excuser

This reflexive verb translates as ‘excuse me’ in English. You can use it to give an apology, make a request or try to get someone’s attention.

We would recommend using excusez-moi as a generally more polite term to use, but you may hear je m’excuse among friends in informal conversation:

Excusez-moi (formal)

Je m’excuse (informal)

Excuse-moi (informal)

  • Using être désolé(e)

This literally translates as ‘I am desolated/upset/distressed’. That sounds quite intense in English, but you can use this phrase in the first person to say sorry to a more serious thing, or to offer sympathy.

Je suis désolé pour ce qu’il est passé. I’m sorry about what happened.

Est-ce que tu es désolée d’avoir dit cela ? Are you sorry for saying that?

In terms of formality, you can use this phrase in different registers:

Je suis désolé(e) (for more formal and serious situations)

Désolé(e) (informal)

dsl (very informal – for messages or texts, like ‘soz’ in English)

The optional extra ‘e’ creates the feminine form, but there is no difference in how this sounds when spoken aloud. For more information, see our Easy Learning French Grammar page on making adjectives agree with what they’re describing.

Now that we’ve covered the ways you can give an apology, let’s move on to accepting or rejecting apologies you receive in French.

  1. Using pas de souci or pas de problème or ce n’est pas grave

These expressions are very casual, in the exact same way we would use ‘no worries’ in English. Respectively, these translate literally as ‘no worries’, ‘no problem’ and ‘it’s no big deal’. You can use these with people you know well or with strangers. They’re generally quite versatile responses and really depends on your tone of delivery!

  • Using the verb pardonner

Coming from the expression pardon that we looked at earlier, you can use pardonner to forgive or ‘pardon’ someone like in English. This is fairly high register, and you’d only hear this in very formal situations.

Je ne peux pas pardonner vote comportement. I cannot pardon/forgive your behaviour.

  •  Using the verb accepter

If you want to accept someone’s apology, in a fairly formal or serious manner, use accepter. At the same time, you can also make the verb negative to reject the apology. You might see this along with the noun for ‘apology’, which is une excuse in French.

J’ai accepté ses excuses. I accepted his apologies.

Language in Use

Here is a summary of the most useful structures covered in this blog. In each example, person A is apologising, and person B is responding to the apology or request. We’ve shared the translations below.
 
A : Pardon, je dois passer !
B : Ah pardon, allez-y.
A: Sorry, I need to get past!
B: Ah sorry, go ahead.
 
A : Excusez-moi, où sont les toilettes ?
B : Ils sont là-bas.   
A: Excuse me, where are the toilets?
B: They’re over there.
 
A : Désolée, j’ai oublié les billets…
B : Ce n’est pas grave, je peux en acheter à nouveau !
A: Sorry, I forgot the tickets…
B: It’s not a big deal, I can buy them again!
 
A : Excuse-moi, il y avait des embouteillages.
B : Pas de soucis.
A: Sorry, there was bad traffic.
B: No worries.
 
A : Je suis désolé pour ce que je vous ai fait. Veuillez accepter mes excuses.
B : À mon avis, c’était horrible. Je ne peux pas accepter vos excuses.
A: I am sorry for what I did to you. Please accept my apologies.
B: In my opinion, that was horrible. I cannot accept your apologies.

Written by Holly Tarbet, freelance copywriter and editor.

All opinions expressed on this blog are those of the individual writers, and do not necessarily reflect the opinions or policies of Collins, or its parent company, HarperCollins.

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