How to cheat in a game of Scrabble

1) Make sure your opponent is seated with a mirror behind them so you can see all their letters.

2) Take too many letters out of the bag when you’re picking, have a sneaky peak and throw the extra ones you don’t like back in – someone did this in a tournament and was spotted and got ejected by a security guard, never to be seen again!.

3) Flick bogies in the bag or at your opponent!

4) Hum a lot

5) Sniff a lot

6) Burp alcohol fumes over your opponent

7) Garlic recommended too.

8) Click knuckles

9) Grind teeth

10) Fart – silent-but-violents!

11) If losing badly, accidently on purpose put your elbow on the corner of the board so all the letters fly in the air and you have to start the game again – an excellent way of avoiding defeat!

12) Drop a couple of sleeping pills in your opponent’s drink – one player was winning a game in an event by 250 points when he dropped off – as they were playing to a clock where you lose 10 points for every minute you go over the allotted 25 minutes, his opponent decided not to wake him up. He stayed asleep for 30 minutes nullifying his lead and only just woke in time to scrape home – justice done! Drug testing hasn’t been introduced into Scrabble yet but perhaps it will!

Of course I haven’t personally indulged in any of these habits, but if anyone has any better ideas I’m all ears!!

By Mark Nyman,
Scrabble Champion

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